Current state assessment

 How do we know which way to travel to get to our goal, if we are not sure of our exact point of departure on the map ?

 And how do we measure our progress if we have not beforehand marked the location of certain points of reference on the road we have planned to follow ?  This section will help us identify the first of these two – be sure to have had a look in the goal setting department first, in order to find out whether you are a top-down planner or belong to the opposite type, who finds it easier to state what he does not like in his present situation, and then goes on to define how much improvement he should be looking at for a worthy goal.

O.K., here goes:

Take a piece of paper which easily folds into the usual purse or bag you carry around most of the time, and get your pen out ! Want to throw in some colors as well ? Great idea !!!

 Draw a circle in the middle and label it as “now”, and then draw a lot of lines coming out of it, as if you were going to draw a sun with its rays. The “rays”can be anything from straight, bent, frizzly, branch-like … be creative whilst bearing in mind that you will want to use these lines to put or “hang” some words and short phrases on, so not too close together.

 Now, start with one ray and decide whether you are going to “load” it with things you like about your family life as it is now, or rather the opposite, and then: “go !!!!” – just keepon writing down all that jumps to your mind and be sure to keep positive aspects apart from the negative ones, that is the ones you are not entirely satisfied with or simply mad about, sad about, etc.

 Try to keep one emotion per line, so you can color them later on and get a coded view of the state of affairs.

…. go on to the next page when done with this, and do not feel shy to take several days to complete this task or to make your drawing over and over, copying the “well defined parts” and reviewing the “not so clear ones” for as many times as it takes for you to feel satisfied with your work – satisfied enough to go on with the step of checking out how much each of these points weigh in your total experience of (un)happiness about your family.

 If you happen to notice some dissatisfactions popping up that do not directly have to do with your family but rather with your job, or another area in your life that bothers you from time to time – don’t worry: just note these in the same way, but on another paper with another label in its center circle.

 You will see that you can just as well apply the same principles we are going to walk you through with regard to family issues, to address these other points of possible improvement in your life – hey, we did not leave anything out here: you are a person with many dimensions, and it is even very common to find out whilst working on one area of one’s life, that some other ones may also need some repair works done …

next: who’s who in your family portrait (click on it!)